Are in you indecisive? Do you ever find yourself in a situation where you are not sure what to do or decide? If you ever feel frustrated or hesitant, then here are 4 steps to help:
- Ask an open question, this usually starts with a Who? What? How? Where? Why? For example, what does this mean to me? How would it make me feel?
- Explore the question. Dive deeper into the situation and what you are trying to solve or achieve.
- Clarify the question by bringing your initial open question together with the reasons you have developed from exploring the question. Does that new sentence sound like what you want? Is your brain already planning an action plan to tackle this? Or does it not sound quite right and needs tweaking? You can go back and ask yourself again until it sounds like what you want.
- Turn this open clarified question into a closed question in order to generate a committed answer and an action. For example, what date and time will you do that? What is the first step? What is stopping you? What would it give you? What is great about it? How would you know?
Everyone loves talking, but in fact, asking the right questions will help you let others speak more, so you can explore what is going on in their minds without it making them feel like they are being interrogated. Asking the right questions allows you to listen, and listening is more important! When someone has been speaking to you for some time and you have asked the right questions to help them dig deep down into their thoughts, then a connection is formed. For example, if you are to interview someone, you may want to only use 20% of the time to ask questions and then let the other person spend 80% of the time answering them, then you can explore who they are quickly and find out if they reveal traits of the values you want. If you are not getting the answer, then maybe you need to re-think the question and ask it in another way.
Are you still stuck answering the question? Then ask yourself this, what would the answer be if I did know? This questions lets you step out of yourself and see if you can answer it again, but from a different perspective. Try it.
Execution is key, when you want to get the best out of a person, you need to understand how that person is behaving at that moment in time, if the person has a very high energy vibe, then you would want to match that tone when communicating to them, this can come from your voice and also physical posture. Likewise, if that person is in a low energy state, then you would be more effective in initially matching them to build rapport, and then slowly but gradually test changing the vibe to something more positive and see how they react to it.
When two people do this to one another for a long time and they pursue this communication back and forth, and the right questions are being asked at the right time from both parties, then this connection becomes a bond, and this is strong.
Ask questions, develop a dialogue within yourself and with others, this will help you and others explore the ideas you have and how to approach it from different vantage points.
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